Tales of Woe and other such Stories.

Hope every one had a Good Easter. Ours has certainly been an eventful one.
Do you have 5 minutes do you love a good yarn? Then pull up a chair , grab a coffee and some chocklit cake and I will begin.
I have a Man on his knees in front of me this very minute! I havn't had that happen since 'The Doc 'proposed to me many moons ago!!! What's he doing, well techincally his not in front of me but kneeling six foot away with his head in the airing cupboard sorting the central heating out. Nothing special you might think in that but we have been waiting since 25th March for a such a person to materialise. Our hot water is up the spout. Not had any for the last month. Do you believe in ghosts? From the sound the boiler was making you'd have thought we had the whole churchyard in the house clanking and dragging their chains around. Every time this happened the boiler cut out so the Doc rang round for a plumber.
First one never showed up and rang to say his Mother was ill and had to go to hospital but even though the Doc left messages requesting a fresh visit, nothing happened.
Second Plumber came out and said the hot water pipe were seized up and tuted and said we needed the floor boards up as the blockage could be anywhere and did we know a chippie cos 'No Sireee' he didn't touch floor boards just pipes!
Slight interlude now whilst the doc rang round for a carpenter to come and give a quote which he did and said he had a plumber he worked with who would fix the pipes cos in the mean time the second plumber said he didn't really want the job anyway.
Third plumber is My Man today and he is not going anywhere till the job is done so the Doc is keeping him supplied with the liquid stuff (tea) to keep him sweet. Hopefully when he refills the tanks from the drain down we will have hot water again.
Last Friday the telephone went dead! More ghostly intervention!! After checking to make sure it wasn't our equipment the Doc logged the fault with the BT. Very prompt service cos they sent a man round on Saturday morning and said "Yep yer line is down and its between the exchange and your house which means there's a broken cable underground somewhere but 'No Sireee' I don't go down holes in the ground!" So fresh fault logged and BT put a divert onto the line to the Docs mobile so at least we can get calls in (though none out).
Now BT pay compensation on a daily rate for all the time your line is down but not a lot of people know that they don't pay compensation over Bank Holidays!! 'No Sireee', so the clock only starts ticking as from today Tuesday. Hows that for service. They are now supposed to be sending an engineer underground on Wednesday. Well at least the internet is still working as that is a seperate line but should I go quiet you will know that the man down the hole has spliced up the wrong cable.
Last Thursday was tinged with sadness for us as FIL would have been 86yrs old. Our son has been in New York for a short break and texted us on Friday to say that he proposed to his long term girlfriend on Grandads birthday in Times Square!! How fitting was that. A visit to 'Tiffanys' followed very shortly afterwards. I think she said Yes!!!
Lastly I've lost track of Monkey. Hasn't been seen since last Wednesday when he said he was going up to London to get his passport organised. If anyone sees him please let me know cos he is only a little chap and not very streetwise.

Will keep you posted on the plumbing and telphone sagas as they progress and of course The Wedding!! Now where did I put my hat pattern.